Thursday, August 19, 2010
Cut Off Notice: Please Pay Your Bill to Avoid Disconnection
Hubby and I are in a good place now...but a few years ago we were struggling to get our bills paid on time and getting further and further behind on medical bills from having 3 children sans insurance...and basically taking out credit score to the dump. But we were living it up. I don't remember ever going without the things that I wanted or needed...this was the problem, I just didn't realize it.
I can still remember the day that lit a fire under me to make a change - to take a stand - the day that changed the way that we both view money and responsibility.
We were in the midst of taking down wall paper in the dining room so that we could paint. Hubby and I were talking about the weekend and the plans that we had. All the sudden we are in the fight of our lives about money. It was always the same argument over and over. There was never enough of it, even though we made good money. Where was it all going? Lots of places: Walmart, shopping trips, online shopping. We were really good at ignoring our bills until we got one of those bright cut-off notices and it was starting to take it's toll. Hubby said I never thought that I would hate the life that I had made for myself - but I am starting to feel that way and I don't know how to stop this cycle. Easy I thought. We should just stop spending our money. So that night I sat down with a piece of paper.
I wrote down all the money that we had coming in...and all the bills that needed to be paid for the month - this in itself was no easy task. I had to find them...it was pitiful - but they were every where from the car, purse and under the coffee table. Once I finally had this done, I realized something very profound. I had enough money to pay every single bill, buy groceries for the month and have some money left over.
But the hard part? We had to stop spending our money...so after the kids were in bed Hubby and I sat down and I showed him the figures...he just kinda stared at the paper for a while then looked up asking me if I thought that I could stop spending my money. I said that I wanted too...if there was money left over this month - then I knew that there would be money left over the next and the next - this looked like the start of a vacation savings (see how my mind was already trying to spend that money?)
So for the month of Jan 2008 - we didn't spend a single red cent that didn't go for groceries of bills...all bills were paid on time and I saved about $50 in late fees alone. We only went for groceries once a week - if we ran out of something we made due.
This was not without a few snags...my kids were heart broken that we were not going places, buying toys or eating out all the time. They were so used to getting, buying and going. I cringe now thinking about what kind of example we were setting for them.
We were at odds trying to figure out what to do with ourselves and no money...we couldn't go to the movies every weekend, run to Wal-mart for the fun of it or eat out. We had to learn to occupy ourselves. This too was a major plus in the end...more family time.
Like I said in the first of this post - we are in a good place now - but it wasn't always this way. It took a lot of hard work and patience but we have been able to get credit cards for both of us, pay off all major debt except for Hubby's student loan, raise our credit score to good range (it's still rising) and we are setting the right kind of example for our kids through good money management, bill payments and saving for the things that we want and need.
I am taking a stab in the dark that we aren't the only ones who have ever struggled with money. What your biggest problem other than there just isn't enough?
This is part of a series on Money Management that I am working on for the next couple of months. I will share the tips and tricks that have worked to keep our family in the black.
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I had an epiphany of sorts one day too about 3 years ago. I am happy to say that right now I am debt-free. It wasn't easy, but I feel so much better living within my means.
ReplyDeleteIt is really hard to get spending into check when you are used to doing it, isn't it? I have realized it this year. We never got a bright colored cut-off notice, but have ofen wondered just where my husband's salary went. It is also easier to cease/slowdown spending when all family members are on board. I have a feeling this will be a great series! :)
ReplyDeleteWith only one income right now, we're being forced to cut way back on the lifestyle we once had. Even tho it's no fun, it's a great learning exercise that we're going through. We'll be much more money smart in the end. Love that you posted about this!
ReplyDeleteOur major problem (and it sounds like you and Greg are the same way) is that neither of us a frugal and neither of us are big spenders. So we just go with the flow, until an issue arises. I also think that we can easily justify "things" by saying "well, we work so hard", and that's ok sometimes but not always. Looking forward to the rest of your series!
ReplyDeleteThanks for opening yourself up like that. I really enjoyed this post. It's not easy to speak about money in a public space, but I think it helps us learn how to better manage our finances when we can share info and experiences with others. I wrote a similar piece about our "ah ha!" moment last year: http://thesehappydays.com/2009/01/our-spending-habits/
ReplyDeleteThis could have been me years ago right when I met Leo...I told him he seriously saved my life money wise! Plus I love him :)
ReplyDeleteHe and I have recently sat down, too, and figured out more ways to save on cash. A big one for us was eating out.
Great post, girl! Thanks for sharing so much with us! xo
Glad you decided to go this route :) I'm glad you were able to figure things out as a family. You guys are doing great now! <3
ReplyDeleteWay to go! You guys doing Dave Ramsey's plan?
ReplyDeleteWow, I know exactly how you guys felt, as we were pretty much in the same position not too long ago. It's great that you were able to make a plan and stick to it. So many people aren't able to do so. Feels great climbing out from under that rock doesn't it.
ReplyDeleteWe are pretty much there right now ourselves. We are making the necessary financial changes, but we still have a ways to go. Thanks for posting this!
ReplyDeleteGlad to hear you're in a better place. Our biggest problem is healthcare bills. Even with insurance, we spend more than 10% of our income on healthcare because we have chronic illnesses.
ReplyDeleteok so somehow I mised this post, I knew it was coming but never saw it!
ReplyDeleteI love it! Sounds great, I have to pull out the budget and re work numbers we haven't done that for a while and we are getting bad about spending, i'm not sure where the money has gone, bu tI know we had to open our VERY first CC ever this year and it is NOT a good feeling
Can't wait to hear more!
you should make a linky and have us all write it down admit our faults and try to work on them and then check up and keep going like you, I think it would be motivational!
The Buzz, B
Our biggest problem is living off one paycheck which is a very low ranking military salary while paying $600 a month in child support for my step daughter and paying $500-1000 a month in speech and occupational therapy for my special needs son. :( We struggle like crazy.
ReplyDelete